high school politicking 2.0. (shudder).
Marketing supremo Seth Godin wrote today: “Any sufficiently overheated industry will eventually resemble high school…filled with insecurity, social climbing, backbiting, false friends, faux achievements, high drama and not much content. Much of this insecurity comes from a market that doesn’t make good judgments, that doesn’t understand how to reliably choose between alternatives. So it turns into a popularity contest.”
As Tom Hanks reportedly said, “Hollywood is like high school, but with money.” The internet, Godin says, is like high school but with a modem. And twitter… is high school but only 140 characters at a time.
As with high school, you ultimately win out when you keep your distance from irrelevant people. And do your own thing.
I was bullied mercilessly in high school. The “clique” found me weird (lived in country, big family, quite liked studing). I found them weird.
Mum would ask if I respected the cliques. I didn’t. “Well, don’t waste your time with them,” she’d say. “Hold your head high.” I thought they wasted a lot of time talking crap and worrying about their boyfriends. So hung out in the library. And with the boys.
In the end, the distance I kept helped me survive and to grow beyond the very limited experience that was Lyneham High. The clique went on to get pregnant too early and waste opportunities.
I’ve seen the same dynamics occur in every workplace I’ve entered. With time to gossip, things slide into stagnant, petty politicking. I edited Cosmopolitan for four years; I need not say more!
In the social media environment, this dominance of the irrelevant masses reaches new heights. Social media success is often, if we’re all not careful and authentic, a popularity contest. People expend vast energy amassing followers and fans. The quality of the connection with these people doesn’t seem to matter. Tactics are utilised to amass these followers. At the expense of care and true contribution.
I sometimes get bogged down in it. And have to come up for air.
OK, herein ends my rant. Apologies for the dank tone. I think it’s because I’ve just been invited to a Lyneham High Year 10 reunion and I’ve found myself caring too much about what everyone might think of me.
Lovely blog. Go to the reunion. You’ll be the most successful fish in a very tiny pond. The girls sounds like the ones I went to school with. And yes, I was always in the library studying. Reading is not evidence of a deficiency in social skills.
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you no I never was in 1 particular crowd I loved walking around with different groups around the school it was my way of getting past the loneliness I felt of my disability. but I liked it that way it meant I could see different ppl different views of what ppl were like but ultimately had a few close ones that I kept as a soundin board for me to grow and talk to. the only thing that I worried about from my early prim school days up til now is not reaching up the expectations of my friends and myself esp in the area of having a job I hate it actually coz it makes me feel like im holding ppl back or there will b distance between myself n friends in terms of friendship. im dreading the day of my reunion so many of them r in jobs n r married and have kids. im still havent got 1 yet, job i mean and im 27. sigh. survial of the fittest.
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Hi I love your website Sarah, you seem to be a very genuine, likeable kind of gal…ps high school..uggh!!!
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Sarah, when I read this blog earlier today my first thought was where is the phone so I could talk to you immediately about the midfield that is the social media environment and school reunions.
A social networking person advised me the other week that I need to have more twitter conversations. He said even if I thought what people were saying was crap is looked good to be engaging with them and agreeing. I responded no way! This smacked of a lack of authenticity and I don’t do that in the real world so it won’t be happening in the twitter world or any other online community – he got the message….less followers for me I guess…luckily I do not want to win the twitter popularity concert.
Several weeks ago, SBS Insight program focused on the trouble with girls, talking about why girls are so mean to each other. I have included the link to this episode (I think this is a great show that takes an “insightful ” look at important social issues). http://news.sbs.com.au/insight/episode/index/id/107#watchonline
In the show, Katya Quigley shared her apprehensive about the reunion and seeing the girls from school twenty years on that had bullied her. I wanted to give this clever, articulate and successful woman a hug watching her talk about her experience at the reunion.
It reminded me that it doesn’t matter how successful we are, what we have achieved, how happy we are with the lives that we have created, how well adjusted we are there are situations and people that can take us back to feeling isolated, vulnerable and at times fearful. For many school reunions do this (for me an occasional family get together can also take me to that place). I find that it doesn’t matter how much I grow and evolve other people will continue to define you in a certain way….and there is nothing you can do to shift their perceptions because you can’t change others people behaviour.
What value would attending your school reunion add to your life Sarah? If you do go, what do you want from that experience? These are the questions to ponder as you decide whether to go or not.
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