the comfort of people from your past
While I was in New York last week, I hooked up with my Year 8 English teacher Mrs Cochrane. Fun-weird. We connected via a few degrees of separation on Facebook, and via the same network, she worked out I was coming to New York (which is where she’s now based) and so we had dinner at Bread in Soho, which is one of my favourite joints, despite the preponderance of bread (which I can’t eat). So I ate braised beef with polenta.
And, OK, after dinner we might’ve popped in to Rice to Riches across the road. You been? Crikey, what an experience. Rice. With riches, such as nuts and chocolate and coconut cream and lots of chunky, sugary bits and…well, dieting is optional.
The funny thing about the night was that it felt like I was catching up with an old mate. Even though I was 14 when we last sat opposite in a classroom. And she was the teacher. And I wasn’t astounding at English (Mrs. C, you gave me a “B” for my metaphor exercise which I still refer to as a life mantra…it was about not rushing down rivers, but finding the quieter pools etc…just saying). And I was a very different person back then to who I am now. I was shy and awkward, although Mrs C says she remembers me as “happy looking”.
Anyway, my point is this: something special happens when you hook up with people from your past, even if you didn’t really know each other back then. The connection exists. You share the same pop cultural cues and, I think, values. I caught up with people from high school I hadn’t seen in 20 years at Christmas and I swear there was a camaraderie between us that I don’t feel with a lot of people. None of us grew up around money, our school was not fancy, we railed against the same teachers and occurrences, we watched the same TV shows etc.
Some Rice to Riches gluten-free action
It’s like dating much older or much younger guys (I’ve done both – 10 years younger and 17 years older!!!) – it’s tough cos you’re just not on the same page. Heck, the same chapter.
Meeting with someone from your past is also a really interesting exercise for seeing how far you’ve come in life. And a good mirror to your perceptions of your “story”, the one you’ve lugged around since high school. I though of myself as a dorky, angsty teen. Mrs C remembers me as bubbly. Which shifts things for me.
An interesting exercise: contact someone from your past and have dinner with them. Just for fun.
I recently caught up with a friend from primary school, and I’ve not seen her since. So about 20 years has gone by…
It was such a refreshing experience – she hadn’t really changed at all, in fact she was even more herself! I think she felt the same way.
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hee hee, she was my year 8 teacher too Sarah! I will always remember her because one day i finished my work earlier than everybody, and she gave me a story by Ernest Hemingway to read, called ‘Hills Like White Elephants’, and she asked me what it was about. I had no idea, so she told me (it’s about a young woman who is about to have an abortion). I never forgot that she thought i was old enough and intelligent enough to get it, because at that stage of my life I felt like the most complete loser on the block, I was seriously weird. I recently re-read that story, for the first time since that class, and it really is an amazing piece of writing.
I also remember doing a rejigged Shakespeare skit to a Beach Boys tune in her class! She was one of only two teachers I liked at school (the other was our history teacher, I can’t remember her name). Glad to see she is thriving.
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My teachers have always played a special role in my life…I realize now how much they have had an effect on me. I’ve only just left school but I know there will always the few that I will never forget.
They can be the most incredible gift to a student.
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P.S. I am looking forward to the reunion days…I already feel like we’ve been separated.
Its hard…but as you said, its life…
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Sarah, a friend told me I ought to come and read this post after she read mine about feeling displaced. I’m so glad I did! I’ve been feeling a little morose lately, the distance between my people from my past and my now is great: I grew up in South Africa, but I live in Melbourne now. I often feel like I speak another cultural language because the music, TV shows, magazines etc I knew as a kid are different to what Australians of my generation knew. The Late Show? I miss all the jokes because I don’t get the politics behind them. Fairy Bread? Someone had to explain it to me.
When I visited South Africa over Easter, I found that I was starting to speak a different cultural language to those folks too! That said, my best friend from school, with whom I still have almost daily contact, ‘gets’ me in just the way you are describing. It’s very comforting.
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What a great pic. Seeing the two of you together brings back lots of memories for me too…. Reunions should be given credit and never undervalued.
Thanks for sharing….
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August 11th, 2010 at 9:50 pm
Hey Tracey, she was unreal… and remembered so much about us all
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