pink worms…and can the positive vibe go too far?
We all saw the gendered election worm last night…what was interesting was that, compared with previous election debates the worm tracked far more positively than normal. Plus, the pink worm (women) was, overall, more positive than the blue (men).
When Julia Gillard or Tony Abbott started sledging the other, both worms took a dive into the dirt. Ditto when they spoke negatively about…anything.
Which begs: do we really believe a positive approach wins, or are we simply seeking happy-happy-joy-joy-ness, at the expense of balanced critical thought? You’ve probably noticed the whole positive psychology spiel that dominates so much discourse these days. You attract what you put out there, and all that jazz. It would appear we’re all seeking a sunnier approach against a backdrop of a confusing, cluttered life.
Over the past couple of years, snark has died. This is a good thing. Snark is what bloggers, in particular, can resort to when they’re trying to be critical…but lack of experience sees them revert to base sledging. I’ve commented on this a lot. Everyone Out There These Days wants their opinion heard and so Everyone is trying to emulate what experienced critics and columnists do. But, sadly, they don’t always pick up on the fine art of pulling apart a topic or argument and critiquing the premise alone…and not the messenger. Since Socrates established the practice, good critical thought has been about gently steering a proposition to encourage openness of thought. To seek truth.
Good critics never get mean. They don’t need to. They can dangle a countering idea so beautifully that the subject of their critical voice crumbles on its own. No violence required.
And so along comes Twitter. And the whole Tweet Love thing. Twitter, on the whole, has ridden the positive psychology wave. I read recently that those who post positive tweets attract more followers. The Observer wrote about this My Town of Kind phenomenon where:
“wide swaths of the Web have become bastions of support and earnest civility, where community-members “retweet” or “reblog” each other’s bon mots, promiscuously proffer thumbs-up, help sell perfect strangers’ books, drive traffic to each other’s blogs and real-world events and even defend one another.
This bit is interesting:
“People sometimes will get bent about something and put it on Facebook or Twitter and realize that’s just not the tone anymore,” said literary PR consultant Lauren Cerand… “really negative people, they don’t have a lot of friends.” (In other words, you’re more likely to think before you tweet when you can actually watch yourself losing your audience with each nasty missive!)
What do we all think of this? Does it get too sycophantic for you at times? It does for me.
That said, I think it’s quite easy to tell the difference between those putting out a genuine positive voice and those seeking followers, or kudos. You can all “smell” the desperate follower grabbers, don’t you reckon?
Anyhow, this note from a reader arrived on Thursday and sums up how the Tweet Love can work nicely. It’s from Thursday ‘s post on transcendental meditation and how I came to meditation via a random recommendation, which was the catalyst to my coming to host MasterChef (you’ll have to read the post to see the connection…). Her comment refers to a post I did on the wonders of the Pomodoro Technique. Somehow it all comes together here, uniting a third person:
Hi Sarah,
I was reading this book ’50 ways to find a lover’ by Lucy-Anne Holmes. The book is hilarious, Lucy is based in London. Her second book is out next month.
Anyway I tweeted one day saying how much I love this book.
And Lucy-Anne Holmes, out of nowhere tweeted me back saying thank you.
Anyway I followed her in tweeter. Then one time, she tweeted, asking which music is good for writing, to get inspiration?
And I tweeted her saying the tomato tik-tok sound, and I asked her to refer to my blog. And to check your website.
and she did. And she got to know how amazing you are.
And she must hv read this post
Because she Just tweeted thatbecause of you (and one other person) she’s going to try meditating.
Isn’t it amazing what Twitter does?
X
Sweet. Have you had a similar Tweet Love encounter that is truly quite bizarre and two-degrees-of-separation-ish? That makes you marvel, ‘Isn’t it just glorious how the world can work’?
I started following and was followed by a tweet friend (let’s call him Pony) of a tweet friend who works in the same industry (let’s call her Pudding). Pony and I exchanged the odd tweet on what we liked about each other’s tweets and what we liked about Pudding’s tweets. Through the exchanges, I learnt that Pony lives in the same place my dearest friend does. When she was going through a really miserable time, and I became desperately worried about her. I felt a long way away, and seperated by distance. I asked a “help” type question via a DM to Pony. He had a think about my crazy random mental health question, and found me a local solution. And a happy ending for my sad friend. Yay.
I also love that you can end a tweet to a tweet friend (whom you have only meet on Twitter) with a xxx smattering of kisses – and it isn’t silly or strange, it’s just expressing love and gratitude. When I tweeted this sentiment about xxx on twitter – I got a lot of lovely messages back just with xxx’s. It wasn’t creepy –it was tweet love.
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July 27th, 2010 at 12:28 pm
Sally, this is really, really lovely. You write in a really sweet way, too. Love it…xxx…
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[...] This post was mentioned on Twitter by sarah wilson, Lorna Brett. Lorna Brett said: I like this .. RT @_sarahwilson_ the power of positive tweets. http://bit.ly/bLmdbR [...]
Sarah, ‘Snark” behaviour has always existed hasn’t it? They now have another playground in bloggersphere. In my work as therapist & facilitator – this is refered to as playing the person not the behavior, so they end up attacking the person instead of the behaviour and the actions.
Lovely comment by Salbra on the tweet love shared.
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Wow this is gorgeous and so simply ingenious! Love the contrast of the emerald green grass with her cute pink garb. I like this blog very much.
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Hi Sarah
I absolutely agree with what you said about twitter.
It’s a straight forward, quick, way of communicating and sharing.
Alot of people say that stuff such as facebook grew your friendship apart, but i find twitter is more of a sharing medium, sharing news, blog, website, stories also personal news.
Isn’t life better with sharing what you know?
And twitter is great because there are no distractions such as games in facebook which I always end up playing. Or I ended up (stalking) checking other people walls and update:(
In Twitter you just check the update and get on with your life.
I check my Twitter every hour but limited my facebook only to Sunday now.
Ps: btw I did read 50 ways to find a lover a few months ago. I don’t normally read chicklits, I always read non fiction and one day just to relax and free my brain from all the real life for one moment, I bought that book. The title caught my eye and just sounds really (chicklit-Ty) and I was pleasantly surprised. It’s really funny and charming and I love it alot! X
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July 27th, 2010 at 12:26 pm
Agghhh, Anna, another layer to the plot!!!
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Sarah,
I recently discovered your blog via The Happiness Project and I’m completely hooked. It’s as though you are the beautiful Australian incarnation of me (:)). As my entire working life is focused on critical analysis (I’m an economist, researcher and policy analyst), I am frankly refreshed by elements of the positivity movement. My analytical nature and practise has frequently run haywire and overflowed into my personal life, tainting my appreciation of my life and myself. I’ve been working on quashing that habit (hence the blog surfing). That said, it has to be real. The truth, dealt out with a dose of compassion, is always the sweetest. Thanks for sharing the terrific content on this blog.
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July 27th, 2010 at 12:25 pm
Hi Stephanie, how lovely to have a voice from Canada (I presume that’s where you’re from?) x
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There is definitely a low signal-to-noise ratio on Twitter, but I’ve managed to make a couple meaningful connections.
A couple times, I’ve sent Gala Darling links or comments via Twitter that she ended up using on her blog, and she always attributes the links to the people who send them. So, I’ve gotten a handful of new followers from things like that. This has lead to my connecting with a handful of people that I really love to talk with via Twitter or to share links/ideas with on our blogs. One of them has become a trusted confidant, whom I am dying to meet in person. A few others are people I could see developing long-term friendships with in time. It’s really hard to meet people and make good friends in a world where there are so many people and everyone’s busy, so I’m very grateful for the folks I’ve met via Twitter.
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July 27th, 2010 at 12:23 pm
Mary, same with me – I’ve met a bunch of journalists for tea following tweet conversations…
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I think one of your advertisements caused my internet browser to resize, you might want to put that on your blacklist.
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