whatever gets you through the night, s’alright
I have a theory. You do your best. And then sometimes things go to shit. In such cases, you do what you can to get through.
Too often, we push and push to eat right, exercise right etc etc and it’s all pushing and punishment. But we don’t allow ourselves to collapse in a heap right. Which sometimes means doing the “wrong” things.
At such times I try to recall something John Lennon sang, “whatever gets you through the night, s’alright”. And sometimes it is.
I was reminded of this when reading a comment from Dani in response to my post on coping with “thryoidy days”:
“On really bad weekend days when I don’t make it out of bed until mid afternoon, I’ll also often have a coffee, which works for me for a couple of reasons. One, it helps clear the fuzz (I usually have 3 or 4 regular coffees a week, so it’s not entirely an addiction thing). Two, it forces me to get out of bed and out of the house and walk 400m or so to my local cafe = gentle exercise. Three, it means I enjoy the human interaction of chatting to the baristas and the regulars. It works for me, but I udnerstand coffee is not on everyone’s “OK list.”
Yeah, coffee is totally “wrong” if you have thyroid issues. Except when it’s right. I really do think it’s better for overall health to back off and give yourself a break and do “what it takes” to get back onto dry ground, than to rigidly stick to the rules.
Really, the important thing is to be gentle and kind and allowing and flowing. And to acknowledge that it’s OK that some days are just about getting through. Actually, sometimes these days turn out to be the more enrichening and true. Because you’ve listened to yourself.
Sometimes, I get through by:
* Taking a sleeping tablet when I’m agitated at 2am and haven’t slept for a few days.
* Drink red wine when I’m tired and emotional. On my own, if need be.
* The chick doing my hair and makeup just now (it’s a filming day) smokes a joint when she’s had a rough day and wants to shut it all down. “I let my mind go on a holiday”.
* Eat a bacon sandwich with a chai tea for breakfast when I wake up dopey and unexcited by life.
* My friend Kersti stays in bed and reads and drinks plunger coffee until 4pm.
You guys? What gets you through?
Coffee! I know it isn’t good if you have thyroidy issues (I have hypothyroidism) but you have to have one vice in life, yes? I can’t drink much alcohol because it makes me feel sick with the meds I’m on, so that is out. A gluten & soy free, low GI diet isnt much fun.
Anyway, one cannot live in Melbourne and not drink coffee… I usually catch up with friends over a coffee at cafes! I would end up a social recluse if I gave up coffee
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I like rules, I like black and white, right and wrong, all or nothing. So the “whatever gets you through” thing has previously upset my balance even more… until I heard Cyndi O’Meara sprike the 80/20 rule. If you do the right thing at least 80% of the time you can splurge 20% of the time. I added that rule to my inner rule book, and now I can do whatever it takes to get through with peace and balance for at least 20% of the time!
I am a migraine sufferer and the “whatever it takes” for me is often required to finish my work and get me safely home and under the covers. It is caffeine and chocolate. Yes, taken at the onset of a migraine it delays the complete breakdown and extreme nausea. That and a heat pack on my head (good look in an office!!) Seen as pure evil by many migraine sufferers, but it’s what it takes to get me through.
Thanks Sarah for sharing your journey. You’re a good egg.
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November 21st, 2010 at 1:57 pm
I’m a migraine sufferer too and the best remedy I have found for me is a 600ml bottle of Diet Coke and 2 aspirin. You would never catch me drinking the stuff on any other day (have you read the ingredients list? scary!) and I’m not promoting its consumption but for me, on those days, it’s exactly what I need. I have tried drinking organic cola but I can’t find any with caffeine, which is really the key for migraine treatment for me.
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Good one Sarah!
I think sometimes we can be too tough on ourselves if we do venture ‘off track’ at one time or another. We should all learn that it is ok, after all we’re only human!
So what gets me through??? That would have to be chocolate…
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Chocolate. Sometimes I just need something insanely sweet.
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Ah, the unbridled joy of a bacon sandwich! Freshly cooked bacon, on buttered white bread – untoasted. It will get me through anything. For 12 months I worked in a job I loathed. The only upside being an in-house cafe, run by a group of lovely old ladies who made THE best bacon sandwiches around. 14 years on, I bacon sandwich remains my pic-me-up of choice. Followed by a pot of green tea – just to balance things out. Great post as usual Sarah.
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I eat almond nut spread by the spoonful or spooned onto (many) fresh dates…often by myself late at night. My stomach and body object greatly to the rich sweetness but sometimes I just need to do it.
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Muesli for dinner. My flatmate gives me crap about it, but it’s the healthiest option I can manage on really tired days.
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Good article.
Last week I left a comment on this blog that simply said…Coopers Green. It was a response to the question “What is the most important thing in life?”. It was kind of a joke. But not really. If I work 15hrs and don’t celebrate the end of the day with a drink or two, I can’t wind down. I did Febfast this year and found the whole process rather frustrating and boring. Except for the money raising aspect of course. During the month, I didn’t feel as relaxed as I usually do after a long day. And I craved chocolate! I never eat chocolate. I guess I was craving the sugar that I would usually consume through the odd CG. So, I’m better off having a drink then aren’t I?
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Three words: chocolate mug cake.
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My psychologist actually sanctions this completely for us auto-immune, high anxiety, type-A folk. He advises that “what Mia wants” (insert your own name!) should to be more important sometimes that the greater good. Not only should be, but HAS to be, the main focus. So if Mia wants to drop the ball and stay in bed with horror movies and cake, that is actually a necessary process for getting my immune system back on track.
The absolute worst thing for a compromised immune system? Stress. If chocolate and bacon sandwiches and the occasional glass of wine help combat that stress then I’m all for it!
Or in my case, something crumbed and filled with cheese from Lenards instead of a proper home-cooked dinner.
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mmmm chocolate and red wine! I don’t have it often but when I do…. Yum!
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Love the granting permission in this post. It’s totally okay to just do what you need to do. There’s no right or wrong answer. I often worry that having a glass of wine after a bad day is numbing, but when it comes down to it, I do it responsibly and I vent while drinking, so it’s all good!
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Someone strays and eats a cream donut, smokes a fag or has a drink breaking their resolution.
What to do? Shrug your shoulders or give up the goal? I know which is wiser.
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I go to bed as soon as i get home and watch old episodes of Friends non stop till I fall asleep!
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November 19th, 2010 at 9:11 am
SAME!!!. I dont laugh much anymore but it makes no difference and thats not the point.. it makes me feel all warm and fuzz and at home with myself. I would add to this rice crackers + ginger beer.
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November 19th, 2010 at 11:52 am
ohh me too. but sex and the city. especially the last season.
without a doubt i cry every time. and then i can pretend im not a crazy person and that im emotional over the show. not life.
xx
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Love this!
For me it’s:
+ hot vegan soup, or a bit of bread (I normally only eat raw food)
+ ground cashews with cacoa nibs and raw honey = raw cookie dough (for breakfast)
+ Lying down in the shower for a half hour
+ Reading many blogs for hours
+ Melatonin when I can’t sleep
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ohh a green & blacks milk chocolate has the ability to pull me through days when i feel like hiding
i also really appreciate Dani’s words.
just this morning when i had dragggggged myself out for a run. i was thinking about how isolated i have made myself working from home and not seeing friends often…. and as i ran past the local coffee joint i thought ‘oh maybe that is a good way to start the day after my run. something to get me ‘out into the world’ ‘talking to other humans’….
so i will take this as a sign from the universe that is. that i should
xxx
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There is a flaw in this logic though. Today, strangely, thinking just the same thing about how sometimes it’s fine to let go, I decided to have a chocolate bar, the first in a very long time. It was yummy, soooooo sweet, but decidedly enjoyable. But then… within 15 minutes I felt like I needed a lie down, yawning and weary. Then came the change in mood, irritable and angsty. My stomach was going crazy and I had to get to a bathroom quick! I couldn’t concentrate back at work and the weariness grew. Even by the time I picked my daughter up from daycare, I was still flat and tired. Worth it? No way.
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November 18th, 2010 at 11:14 pm
That is the most ridiculous thing I have ever read.
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November 19th, 2010 at 12:27 pm
Jason, why? My comment is as valid as anyone’s.
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November 19th, 2010 at 1:27 pm
maybe you are right but I’m just trying to get my head around somebody eating a small chocolate bar then…within 15 minutes needing a lie down, yawning and weary. A change in mood, irritable and angsty. Stomach going crazy and a trip to the bathroom. Lack of concentration at work and weariness. Later on, still feeling flat and tired. Bloody hell, don’t go for a 250gram block whatever you do.
November 19th, 2010 at 1:38 pm
That’s what happens when you have an illness such as mine. I don’t feel it is necessary or pleasant to comment on the validity of someone’s experience. If you have something to add, or a story to relate, go ahead and post and your thoughts. If not, please don’t brand me a fool.
November 20th, 2010 at 4:26 pm
Ok, fair enough. Sorry if I upset you .x
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April 6th, 2011 at 12:24 am
i can understand viola’s point of view, high GI sugar hit can easily cause a crash like she’s described…Jason shouldn’t criticise something he hasn’t experienced, arrogant much?
My favourite piece of advice this year, from my sister, was to let myself off the hook … she meant it in the context of how I feel I must finish a book if I start reading it, even if I can’t get into it, but one day she said to me “sometimes you just need to let yourself off the hook” … it’s my favourite piece of advice EVER … and I love applying it to other things too … those few words are so liberating and sometimes you just need to say them to yourself.
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I bake!
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Smoking.
I know it is terrible, but when I hit bottom, I crave a cigarette. It gives me a moment to collect myself.
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A big breakfast, cup of coffee, something sugar-y and an episode of House M.D.
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Love this post. I push myself a lot and sometimes just need to bleugh. I stay in bed, electric blanket on, curtains closed watching West Wing DVDs on my Mac and eatting whatever I want. Usually chocolate and pitzas. I check email a million times, read loads of blogs, snooze and just enjoy being horizontal in the dark. After a few hours, I rebound into action much stronger than I was before. Horizontal, in the dark, with no time pressures. Bliss.
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November 20th, 2010 at 1:31 pm
It’s interesting that you ‘enjoy being horizontal in the dark’ and do lots of stuffs while in bed. I’m quite the opposite, when I lie in bed (when alone that is
), I fall asleep very quickly. Horizontal for me = rest. Weird huh?
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- A glass of wine in the evening
- If its been a really big week lay in bed most of Sunday ( watch Insiders…. Mr Charisma Barrie Cassidy,
snooze if its a boring one on one interview, followed by old movie, read…snooze…read )
- Debrief with non judgmental friends ( with one in particular we have a totally inappropriate saying
that always makes us end up laughing )
- But one of the best things I find is to look deep into the eyes of my dogs whilst giving them an ear
rub…….they bliss out from simple pure joy which always makes me feel a whole lot better
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Ah, how I love these ideas and the indulges! But do I do it? Not nearly enough. Dont’ get me wrong – I’m smokin the joints and drinkin the beers, but do I allow myself that? Hardly enough, I’m forever beating myself up about what I ‘should’ do, or whats ‘right’ to do. So for me, what really gets me through, is learning to let myself go….
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Sleep gets me through. Last Saturday I was so tired that I left a friend’s barbecue and took myself to bed at 8pm and slept for 12 hours. I felt so much better for it on Sunday.
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What gets me through? If it is linked to the man in my life (a fight or a breakup) or I’m feeling unloved i have to hide. Dark room, sex in the city reruns and my body weight in melted cheese and tomato on toast (or bowls of homemade mash or butter on pasta or icecream or anything else that is white food). If I’m feeling down or exasperated about work I shop. If I’m worried I call on wine. All these things help, for awhile, but at some point I ‘get through’ and start to want fresh veggies, swimming on the ocean and gallons of herbal tea.
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Love reading your posts sarah, makes one feel very connected to strangers, and sooo much less guilty about my indulgences and me time. Cheers xx
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