loud chewers, dripping taps: coping with what drives us bananas
This week in Sunday Life I make peace with annoyances
by Neil Stewart
I’m a very annoy-able person. A lot of things annoy me. Here’s a small sample: sniffing, loud chewing (the type Americans do in sitcoms when in heated discussions at diners), mid-90s ozonic perfumes, when the person sitting next to me on the plane keeps brushing my elbow, people who don’t reuse their paper cup at water fountains and slow walkers on narrow paths.
And that’s just the scab on the wound. I have a deep gash worth of stuff that gives me the irits.
Actually, the word “irits” gives me the irits. In the same way “I’ll do it in a mini” does.
But the most annoying thing of all is that I’m so annoy-able. Such things really shouldn’t annoy me. And this annoys me further. And so down the spiral we tumble.
During the week I chatted with Flora Lichtman, coauthor of the new book Annoying: The Science of What Bugs Us. Her pet annoyance is people clipping their nails on the subway (who knew!?). Indeed, having a guy next to her do so one morning prompted the book.
Lichtman identifies three factors that make something annoying. It’s unpleasant. It’s also unpredictable. Take the most oft-cited annoyance – people talking loudly on mobile phones. A Cornell University study found it’s annoying because we only hear half the conversation. Our brains are programmed to solve, to predict the next word in conversations. So these “halfalogues” shit us to distraction because we can’t ignore them and we can’t predict what comes next. Like being left hanging on an un-climaxed sneeze… for fifteen minutes.
The third factor is uncertain duration: a dripping tap is fine if we know it will stop in three minutes. It’s the fact we don’t that drives us mental.
But at the end of the day (apologies to people who find clichés intolerable) what makes something really annoying is the spine-twistingly irritating reality that it’s so trifle. “The other person has every right to sniff, or walk slowly because it’s such an insignificant thing,” Lichtman says. “Which means we have no right to control it.” Yes! That’s it! It’s the fact I can’t ask a sniffer to stop sniffing that’s so bloody annoying. It leaves me trapped. And trapped with a constant reminder – sniff, unpredictable pause, sniff – of my failure to cope.
Richard Carlson picked up on this phenomenon with his series of Don’t Sweat The Small Stuff books, reminding us that it is in fact the tiny stuff that provokes.
It’s an oddity of the human experience that we can handle big crises – we find inner strength, we rise to the occasion and we grow from them.
I’d argue that it’s because we have permission to actually do something in the face of large calamities. We’re allowed to seek divorce from a cheating partner, for instance.
With the sweaty small stuff we can but sit on our hands.
So is there a dignified path out of such a double bind? Lichtman explains a lot of annoyances appear to have an evolutionary basis – nails down a blackboard mimic a primate warning call. Sulphur is present on the earth where there are low oxygen levels, which might be why we find eggy smells unbearable. I find this comforting. My low tolerance levels have a purpose and might just preserve me on the planet longer. And this abates my annoyance that I’m so annoy-able.
But drawing my comfort from Richard Carlson’s thinking, I reckon the best antidote is to not fight an annoyance, but to sit with it. I tried out a Bikram – or hot – yoga class last Sunday to test the theory. I find Bikram yoga inordinately annoying – people sweat and sniff and grunt. And the instructor yells really annoying things like: “Be an angel of pain”. What the? A total assault of the senses and sensibilities.
This time I didn’t fight it. I didn’t move my mat away from the stinky man with the cold. I stayed with the annoyance. And after about 15 minutes it was no longer annoying. Why? Lichtman suggests it’s because I eliminated the “uncertain duration” factor. I accepted it as certain that the annoyance wouldn’t go away. And so I regained some control.
Or there is always this from Carl Jung:
“Everything that irritates us about others can lead us to an understanding of ourselves.”
Which really is annoying!
I LOVE hearing what annoys other people. It’s pervy-comforting. It’s these quirks that make us feel connected, I reckon. Not so alone…So share! What drives you crrrrrazy?
I’m a student by distance, so all my lectures are podcasts. My current lecturer has quite a lovely smooth European-sounding voice, and he speaks very close to the microphone quite gently. But then every so often he swallows the most disgusting, wet spittley sounding swallow, straight into the microphone. It’s driving me crazy as I’m revisiting all the lecture before my exams and makes me feel slightly nauseous and I can’t concentrate on what he’s actually saying.
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June 12th, 2011 at 10:29 am
Eew that would be very unpleasant
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June 12th, 2011 at 10:29 am
Meanderers on ANY width of path (usually they are texting) Radio newsreaders with a mouth full of slag….sniffers, and especially those who snort and swallow, and mispronouncers. Aaaaagggghh get me away from them all!
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June 12th, 2011 at 10:53 am
I so know that noise…Listen to Phillip Adams on Radio National at night…he does the same into the mic…
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I have a naturally quiet voice so my no.1 annoyance is…Loud Voices!! I get SO irritated. It’s like being bashed in the head with another person’s voice and I sit and wonder why they can’t speak quietly, in a non-concentration disrupting manner.
The second thing (besides slow walkers, people who take forever to order their food at restaurants, people that play their personal music devices out loud) is people that upon hearing a joke on the t.v or movie we’re all watching, must immediately repeat it. Maybe they think we didn’t get it or something? I kind of consider most of that stuff attention seeking. I feel like a grumpy old woman now
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June 12th, 2011 at 10:16 am
I understand the loud voice thing…but I work with someone who whispers all the time so I’m constantly going “what? huh?” And what makes it worse is…sometimes she just mouths her words…and she has a lisp so I have no chance of lip reading. It’s as if she feels like we are always being listened to by someone and it’s SO frigging annoying!
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June 13th, 2011 at 5:10 pm
Ohhh I hate the people who say the punchline BEFORE it’s even said in the tv show or movie. These people who’ve seen the show before seem to think it’ll be more funny coming from them? Hate it, hate it, HATE IT!! SHUT UP!!
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Vegans who tell me their way of eating is healthy give me the shits majorly partly because the young lady who often does this has a severe eating disorder and she uses the vegan thing as an excuse to get people off her back. When others aren’t around she is happy to eat ice-cream or eat milk chocolate…
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June 14th, 2011 at 12:54 pm
Agreed with you on the pushy vegans thing – although anybody who approaches their food with a level of fanatacism usually reserved for cults or suicide bombers tend to get my back up… animal eaters are not exempt. I have done a lot of research and carefully selected the most ethical, nutritional, healthy diet for myself and those who preach outdated dogma and unfounded accusations at me without any interest in why I chose what I chose for MY LIFE… Argh!
See, Im ranting. Definitely something that makes me annoyed.
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Oh Sarah – I totally get this. I can’t stand slow walkers – I normally sigh out loud to show my annoyance and then proceed to powerwalk past them. People who take ages to get their sentences out, people who can’t make up their mind, people who stand too close to me in the line at the supermarket – so annoying!!
P.S Are you going back to Bikram? I just started a couple of months ago and normally I would hate exercising so close to other people especially really sweaty people but I love it!
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You are not alone! I wouldn’t normally do this but I am annoyed at my housemate and a vent would be nice
People who ransack the lounge to have a movie night and then just leave it ransacked, and don’t put the couches back in their proper place, I mean really? I’ve been at work for the last 6 hours in the freezing cold – it would be nice not to come home to a disaster zone.
Loud chewers, I am sorry – but I avoided masterchef for this very reason (though I have been completely sucked in this year, wish you were still hosting!) Do they edit in the chewing sounds made by everyone just to irritate people??
Also irritated by those people who are not polite enough to let a person merge into a lane (as in, when one lane is closed for whatever reason, and every car will go car for car and let the other lane of cars merge in – except for that one rude person who thinks he is more important and must get to their destination before the car next to him)
…. and breathe…
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Sniffers, definitely. My ex-flatmate sniffed constantly and loudly over the 18 months we lived together and I never managed to come to peace with it. Drove me up the wall and I never, ever said anything about it because I thought it would rude to do so. Not to mention humiliating for him. Not really my place to tell him to stop because item it’s me with the problem – that’s what really drives me crazy, knowing I can’t control it. But I also find sniffing to be genuinely rude and inconsiderate of others and that’s also why I find it annoying!
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Yes, loud voices. Neighbors who use gas-driven yard tools every weekend and some week days for hours and hours on end. There cannot be that much work to do in such a small yard; I think it’s just to use a lot of gasoline, which should be criminal, not just annoying.
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People who think they can say whatever they like to whoever they like whenever they like, (because they thought it so it must be said), but then expect everyone else to constantly consider the feelings of that person and watch what they do or don’t say in case his/her balloon-type ego blows up from a single thorny remark.
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People who can’t string a sentence together without using the words ‘ummm’ & ‘you know’
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Goodness me, how bad life must be to get the irits at (I’m assuming accidental) elbow brushing on a plane! Perhaps the answer is to live in a bubble world away from humans and their annoying little habits.
BTW Sarah, do you have any little habits that might drive others nuts?
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June 12th, 2011 at 3:57 pm
I think it’s the people who sniff and snortle through their day and invade others private space that live in a bubble! They seem unaware of their impact on others. Although i do think many are genuinely unaware of either that their behavious isn’t socially acceptable or, for example. habitual sniffers, that they are even doing it. Airplanes are the worse for ‘anti social’ annoying behaviours cos there are so many cultures thrown together each with their own norms. 18 hours on an overpriced cramped flight with a sniffer and elbow pusher in the seat beside you test even the most easy going…………..
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June 12th, 2011 at 4:12 pm
If you want to travel in comfort on a plane, buy a business class ticket. You get what you pay for!
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June 12th, 2011 at 4:30 pm
Not true – the price variation in the ecomomy class is huge because of the way airlines allocate seats. Some seats in ecomony are more than double the cost of others and close to business class. I never sleep when i fly so i know that people around me who are sleeping must be annoyed by those like me who are getting up to the loo etc when they are trying to sleep. And people in business still sniff and have noisy kids! It’s just a part of flying I guess……a trial sent to test us!
June 13th, 2011 at 7:54 am
Hi Leila,
For fuck sake that’s ridiculous. Not everyone can afford to fly business class can they? Thick.
June 13th, 2011 at 9:41 am
Hey, you’re the thick one nt – don’t you know sarcasm when you see it! Fuckwit
June 13th, 2011 at 3:47 pm
Poor attempt at humour then isn’t it. Loser.
June 13th, 2011 at 9:45 pm
NT and Leila, please don’t. Yeah?!
It’s totally true what you say, Sarah, that those little things can be SO frustrating and anger-inducing, yet at the same time you know that it is completely silly and trivial to let such insignificant details ruffle your feathers. In relationships in particular, it’s easy to forget about all of the admirable qualities that your partner has (like overall kindness, good humour, honesty etc) when they leave their dirty washing around or *insert other annoying habits here*. So, I was wondering – how do you know when something that annoys you is something you should just deal with (i.e. it’s your problem) and when is it something that you have a right to speak out about (i.e. it’s their problem)? Love your posts by the way:)
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June 12th, 2011 at 4:17 pm
I think when it’s your partner the intimacy you share overcomes the annoying habits – also i find that they are normally the basis of the small little humourous insider moments in a relationship. If I find myself starting to get annoyed by my wonderful partners annoying little habits I tend to step back and use it as a barometer – often I am tired, stressed etc or we haven’t had much quality tim etogether recently. Thankfully being an easy going guy he is far more forgiving than me…..;-)
I KNOW for sure that I do many things which annoy many people. Everyone does. being annoyed by someone isn’t about judging them…..it’s just a natural follow on from living aroud others. Very true that the control aspect comes into it though.
I would also guess that most men lving with a roomie etc with an annoying habit just tells them – not in a mean or nasty way just in a factual manner. Most women are probably ‘too considerate’ to do this. I am sure that most of the time if we told each other what we found annoying then we would willingly stop doing that behaviour. Nobody wants to annoy someone else…….
Now there is an interesting topic…..when did we all become so unable to communicate with out causing/taking offense that we can’t mention that sniffing…..???
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June 12th, 2011 at 4:27 pm
Are adelaide & vic one in the same (very similar writing styles or just coincidental names both in lower case?). All we need now is for sa or nsw to join the mix.
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I can’t stand seeing people chewing their fingernails, it drives me insane! Please people, do it in private! Arghhh!
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This blog is annoying with the overlapping text!
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June 12th, 2011 at 6:58 pm
Agree Qld..thought the problemo was fixed
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June 13th, 2011 at 7:31 am
What overlapping text?
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June 13th, 2011 at 9:04 am
i’ve started giving up on it. don’t think it’s ever going to get fixed!
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June 13th, 2011 at 2:11 pm
Cant see any problems re overlapping text or other issues. I access the site via iPad, iPhone & Chrome without issues – perhaps it your browsers guys?
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June 13th, 2011 at 2:27 pm
Johnno, you are keen on this site
June 13th, 2011 at 3:09 pm
Gotta keep tabs on this Wilson lass, Mai. Keepin’ it real.
June 13th, 2011 at 3:20 pm
How cute – a boy crush
June 13th, 2011 at 3:51 pm
Not everyone has a Mac though do they? And if I did I’d smash the fucking thing over your head you smartarse bollock.
June 13th, 2011 at 3:57 pm
BAHAHAHAHAH. Think you need to book yourself into an Anger Management 101 class, nt.
June 14th, 2011 at 8:07 pm
NT, you are a muppet mate – I don’t have any Mac gear at all! Just the iPhone & iPad, otherwise I’m 100% PC. But you would have worked that out from the Chrome mention in my post, unless you’re a muppet. How is Kermit these days bro?
June 13th, 2011 at 9:38 pm
Apologies for those put out be any gremilins…I’ll try to sort. I’ve had someone go through all the main servers, but they haven’t been able to fix it yet. NT – not loving your language or treatment of others on here…please do back off.
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Loud chewers, slow walkers, personal space invaders, line cutters, people who talk with their mouth full, people who can’t differentiate between their and they’re, slow drivers, fast drivers, people who cut me off on the road… actually most drivers in general… hmmm… I’m a very annoy-able person too it seems
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I don’t really get annoyed by little things. Most likely because I am in my own little world! Which probably means that I do most of the things that annoy others, without realising…
Come to think of it, I do get a little bothered by people who do let the small things get to them. Frustrated is the better word, especially when they allow their annoyance to taint what would have otherwise been a pleasant experience… for themselves and others.
I don’t mean to be pious… I just count myself lucky that I can easily block things out. Everybody is different!
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June 13th, 2011 at 7:32 am
I love that people like you exist! A lot of my friends are like you…and for that I’m glad.
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Slow walkers. People standing in front of the bus doors when CLEARLY I want to get out – hello, people, did you learn physics, I can’t go through you! People who ask “What’s up” (yeah, I know, this is everyone, but I’m talking about those people who ask just for the sake of asking).
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When I sneeze 3 or 4 times in a row and when I can’ t stop hiccuping, I get sooo annoyed/angry. Also when I say something and the person asks 3 times what I said because they weren’t listening.
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This is my one big thing I cant stand:
People flossing (their teeth) in the same room as me. or “plinking” as I call it
I just hate the noise. It shouldn’t annoy me as much as it does. I do think its something to be done in the bathroom though. Not when your watching TV!! (clearly I have lived with someone who did it in front of the telly)
also, on the dental hygiene theme : people who leave white flecks of tooth paste all over the bathroom mirror
I also hate the noise that nail filing makes.
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people talking to me when Im in a rush, open mouth chewing, people eating apples, people ‘slirping’ anything, sniffing, coughing or sneezing without covering their mouth.
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Yes the lingering unknown can be rather annoying. I particularly dislike when people end text messages with “……………………” or “hehe”??, or are talking and just spontaneously stop mid sentence. It erks me!
Glad you gave bikram a go, I am enjoying my trial month and contemplating signing up for more.
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Its so funny how the smallest annoyances can really drive us to an inner rage! I can’t stand sniffing, coughing, repeating what I have just said – it drives me mad, people walking slowly in front of me, driving behind large vehicles or trucks as I can’t see beyond that vehicle which bugs me, when people don’t express whether they are happy to do something or not – like when my cousin from England visited and I showed her as much as I could and she didn’t give me much idication as to whether she was ‘happy’ or not (she did enjoy herself but I didn’t know this at the time; here people chewing when they are eating, when people breathe funny gah it drives me mad. I also get disproportionately irritated when my apartment isn’t clean and neat and tidy, I’m just a tad neurotic about it!
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*hear
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I disliked when the guy behind me in Bikram burped loudly and constantly the ENTIRE class! Made me feel queasy!
I dislike drunk neighbours who play loud music at 3am on weeknights when I am trying to sleep.
I dislike people who talk with their mouth full of food and chew with their mouth open.
I dislike people who say LOL. Not type LOL (although that is kind of juvenile) but who SAY LOL, out loud. If you aren’t laughing out loud why do you need to say LOL..?
All things considered though it’s not that big a deal. People are people. We are all different. There is always going to be somebody who shits us without knowing they do it. The same way, things we do without realising are going to annoy other people. Unless it is deliberate or callous, I try to laugh and shrug it off, its much healthier that way.
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I feel like I have vented just from reading all the ways everybody else gets the irrits. I’m normal! Huraah!! I get irritated by the same habits…
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June 18th, 2011 at 8:26 am
Me too…!! Especially the open mouth or loud chewers…. that makes my blood boil too – good to see I’m not alone…
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Two things do my head in. People who read over my shoulder (especially on the train) and those who continually stir the sugar in their coffee cups. The noise of the spoon against the china or glass is unbearable.
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June 17th, 2011 at 2:20 pm
Agreed. I cannot stand people reading over my shoulder. I will automatically stop what I am doing and wait til they move on!
Also people who drive slow in the right hand lane. Stay left or move the f#$k out of my way. It’s that simple.
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thanks for sharing everyone!
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Internet trolls! They’re irritating and pathetic! Haven’t people got better things they could do with their time? Like be half decent human beings?
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I am annoyed by people who:
- Suck up when they want you to do something or try to get you to do something by complimenting you
- Ask a question indirectly (e.g. Where did she go, I wonder…)
- Chew loudly and/or with their mouth open
- Speak with their mouth full
- Don’t close their legs while seated (especially women)
- Say “is it?” when it does not make grammatical sense (e.g. “We’ve been on this campus 5 times” “Is it?”)
- Speak very quickly or do not enunciate when they speak (so you cannot understand them)
- Put “lol” at the end of things that aren’t funny (e.g. “Spending the night studying lol”)
- Walk slowly AND take up the whole walkway
- Stop walking in doorways or at the tops of escalators
- Start sentences with “Yeah…” when you weren’t having a conversation (e.g. *silence* “Yeah, I don’t like peas”)
- Pick & flick snot or ear wax (gross!)
- Use the word “alot” (it isn’t a word!)
- Pause in the middle of a sentence/story and don’t finish it
- Use ‘of’ instead of ‘have’ (e.g. should of, could of, would of)
Gosh, that’s not good… Perhaps I shouldn’t have admitted to those.
T.
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June 14th, 2011 at 8:58 am
I agree with everything you said. Especially the point you make about ‘alot’. Since WHEN did that become a word?
Whenever I see it, I cringe.
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June 17th, 2011 at 5:10 pm
I couldn’t stand it either, but now I just visualise the ‘alot’ when I see it written that way and it makes me giggle instead:
http://hyperboleandahalf.blogspot.com/2010/04/alot-is-better-than-you-at-everything.html
It bugs me that suddenly no one spells ‘you’re’ correctly… it’s always ‘your’ these days. Expecially noticeable on the majority of facebook likes.
I am annoyed by those who, after a lift has been vacated by a few people, still stand pretty much on top of me. There is space now! Take a step away from me!
I hate people who line up behind me at the supermarket and bump me. Again, personal space please.
People who have BO first thing in the morning. How do they have such bad hygiene? People who drive under the speed limit. It’s set at that speed so the WORST drivers can handle a vehicle in poor conditions. Do anything less than the posted speed and you’re an idiot.
People who sneeze or cough without covering their mouth. People who stop in the supermarket and block the whole aisle with their trolley. People who tell me to suggest a restaurant or take-away because I’m vegetarian and assume I’m super hard to cater for (I’m not) but then ‘hate’ every cuisine on the planet and make going out for dinner the most challenging thing in the world. Why not just bloody pick something yourself instead of saying no to everything I suggest then?!
Must calm down now, I’ve riled myself up just thinking of all of these!
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June 18th, 2011 at 8:27 am
Great list… made me giggle too…!
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July 14th, 2011 at 11:51 am
What about the word ‘like’? Has anyone noticed how like, everyone says ‘like’ these days?
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I suspect I’ll be unpopular here, but to me, flip-flops are a crime (when not used for the beach or the pool). I can’t stand listening to the sound of them on the pavement, in the hall, at the airport…
(And I also think they’re ugly…but then I spend a lot of time in Italy and I like leather shoes… 
)
I used to be annoyed by a lot of little things, but I’ve found that lately I’ve become a great deal softer. It makes sense, but I’m touchy largely when my level of personal anxiety is high.
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-When I’m dining with someone and they don’t close their menu when they’re ready to order.
-Misspellings of your/you’re or they’re/their/there
-When drivers don’t use their blinker
-When people sit too close to me
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Loud chewing drives me crazy.
It’s interesting though after reading your post Sarah that I know when the chewing will stop – when they’ve finished their meal. However I can’t help but leave the room when my housemate is chomping/slurping away on his feedbag (yes, like some kind of ANIMAL).
It’s not just annoying, it makes me cringe.. I really have to leave the room and would find it very difficult to sit through it until it no longer annoys me!
Glen
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Ha, my two pet hates are not listed yet. The first is when you are at the movies. I like to disappear into the story so I hate people talking, kicking the back of my chair, scrabbling through their popcorn box, slurping their drink or answering their mobile phone!
The other one is when you let somebody in to your line of traffic on the road and they can’t even be bothered to raise their hand to say thanks – Brisbane drivers are so incredibly rude. And that reminds me, when somebody screeches out in front of you when the road behind does not have a car in sight, and then they slow down to turn at the next road which is a few metres away!! As I said, Brisbane drivers!
And NT, play nicely in the sandpit!!
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This annoys me
…Focusing on small, pathetic imperfections in other human beigns instead of appreciating the unique quirks that make us all interesting.
Half empty / half full.
Can everyone stop contributing to the lack of care and understanding for the fellow man/woman, please? If you can bear it, that is.
Can at least one venter from above promise to me that the next time they are utterly annoyed by these tiny human errors, find something humerous about it. E.g.: imagine Chris Lilly doing it?… Or whatever floats your boat.
Love!
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June 16th, 2011 at 11:31 am
I can appreciate various human oddities. I just don’t appreciate people who are flat-out inconsiderate.
I feel your post is a little pious. There’s nothing harmful about having a vent here and there. Try viewing it as a quirk…
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I can’t stand words like ‘arvo, g’day, cuppa’
ARGHHHHHHHHH
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June 17th, 2011 at 4:18 pm
Ohhh, another one – sanga.
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June 22nd, 2011 at 10:13 am
For me, it’s ‘souva’, ‘snags’ and ‘hubby’ – really hate the last one especially.
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I just read this and was trying to think of what annoys me when I read complete strangers having a go and swearing. That’s one thing that really gets myback up is other people not accepting other people’s opinions. This is a space for people to express themselves not bash them for it!
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Well goodness….here I was thinking that I’m getting old and sooo intolerant but clearly I’ve got company. Thanks Sarah for bringing up this topic and making me feel normal. My short list would have to be:
* People who talk very loudly in public and particularly behind me on a plane and seem to think that everyone else within say a kilometre is very very interested in what they’re saying. Forget reading my book – can’t concentrate:(
* People who constantly knee me in the back whilst on the plane. Come on guys I’m a 6ft tall woman and I manage to keep my knees under control!
* People who sneeze/cough without covering their mouth anywhere within my personal space or the three metres or so that the droplets apparently travel.
* People who push shopping trolleys sideways (why??) so that they take up the entire walkway.
* “Ladies” who drop toilet paper all over the floor in public restrooms and leave it there for someone else to pick up. Rude.
Apart from that (there are so many others) but they mainly relate to people being inconsiderate of those around them. Not difficult…just think.
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I get annoyed by one of my friends who can act really bossy or who always thinks she’s right! Today she bossed me around for the whole day because she was hanging out with the teachers on a trip (we’re both 17) – I had to play my music to drown out her annoying voice. I don’t know if that sounds harsh, but honestly if I’m away from her, tomorrow I’ll be absolutely fine, so I agree, when you think about it, and remember the annoying thing, that it’s worse.
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Just read confront my racism in Sunday age. Made a lot of sense and brought tears to my eyes. You should change your name to Sarah Wisdom.
regular bloke in Melbourne who loves his footy too.
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Most of my ones are manners based:
* I actually make a big effort to give way when I drive even when not necessary on the basis that I may effect some cultural change over the city and I CANNOT BEAR people not even raising hand to say thank you.
* people pushing their way on to a tram BEFORE the people have got off. What is the point? It’s not as if the tram will leave. And there will be no seats if you get on before the others have got off.
Grammar based:
* confusion between its an it’s, your and you’re and yours – drives me crazy. Its basic Year 3 grammar which my daughter is learning so you don’t have the excuse you missed that year.
* inappropriate inverted commas ie “Special” is it special or not or are you being saracastic?
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I am very annoy-able too, but the thing I struggle most with lately is a co-worker who sniffs constantly (I can count to ten quite quickly in my head between sniffs – the fact that I know they are coming so regularly does my head in and I swear, the sound of it hurts my ears!!). I have passed her tissues before which she declined, saying she doesn’t blow her nose just sniffs! Another time I said “gee that sniffing must drive you crazy” and she laughed and said she doesn’t notice it anymore. I BLOODY WELL DO THOUGH! I think it is just a habit with her. She NEVER stops. Not when she is talking or eating. Never. Aaaargh! Does anyone have any strategies on how to stop this affecting ME so much?
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Rather than tip-toeing around the issue, just be direct and say that her sniffing is very distracting. If people don’t know, then they can’t do anything about it.
Worked for me when I had the team whinge to me daily about someone’s BO. I just had a direct chat to the person and they were more embarrased than anything. Last time we ever had that problem.
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